God Speed Stodgy Satay.

Hello again everyone, I'm sure you will all be delighted to know that I am using speech to text software to automatically take it very wants you are reading now. Like most bloggers I woke up this morning wondering what on earth I could see today and decided just to blog about the first thing we think I'm banged.

Already I can see from the words above that this thing is still struggling with a Scottish accent against today's post is going to be briefly in? View of my faithful followers will have noticed I've been posting more of the deal lately that I have been writing. I get a definitive date for my surgery on August 2 so hopefully it won't be too long before I am typing again or losing an hour and resigning myself to their software for my life.

Unfortunately a downside of using each detector software is the dog barking in the background and the TV running also. So don't be surprised if this thing. Automatically align a speech from toy story two which is what the kids are watching. Or every other sentences punctuated with both would would worth with both (Goddamit that's supposed to be woof woof lol - Yeah I typed this bit.)

Oh (That 'Oh' was my Dog barking) - I can see this remains a pointless exercise and are going to have to train it rather in the nuances of a Scottish accent (not the dog - the software)

God is the stodgy

God speaks softly

God speeds of three

God speed stodgy satay surgery - yes it's got its rights in the end!

(I should mention that it does more than just type my words (or tries to) - it also goes anywhere you want it to on the internet by command. Imagine my frustration then, when after saying 'surgery' for the tenth time it closed this page and took me to 'e-bay'. Aaaaaargh.)

It's still work in progress.

Rory

Slow

Typing is still hard to do - easier to make movies these days. With that in mind I remember when I first came to Australia. I had written a song just before I got here and my step-daughter (who was only 16) wanted to make a video to go along with it - so at great expense (I reckon the budget ran to about $18 for petrol to get to the top of a mountain) Here it is - I found bits of it in this lap top and put it together with new titles today - You are allowed to be scathing about the song lol - I can take it :) Don't knock the Director though - she's just a wee lass armed with enthusiasm and a cheap camera. The female backing vocalist on this is a barmaid I met in Scotland and I thought she had a great voice - she's now a nationally renowned singer - Claire McNeill.

Rory.

If a picture paints...

If a picture paints a thousand words then this short video film I made yesterday, hopefully speaks volumes. Sorry folks I don't want to make anyone melancholy or depress anyone today lol - I just felt a real need to at least 'do something' and have it on record.

Feel free to pillory me lol!

Rory

Do You Come Here Often?

There comes a time in everyone's life (they think) - when they have to make the first move. You know? You have to open your mouth and let words fall out which indicate 'beyond all reasonable doubt' that you're 'interested' in that person. The 'chat up' line I guess. I always had a problem with this - maybe it was the fear of rejection? My feeble attempts to get to know someone better would confuse and mix 'polite conversation' with "Jeez I'd love to get your knickers off" - In short, I was banal and confusing (banality always gave you a way of saving face if rejected - you could argue that you were never chatting someone up in the first place). So the teenage years of Rory D Grant were spent uttering stupidities like "Would you like to dance? I know you'll be a good dancer because you have nice shoes." or "What a beautiful blouse - My Mum has curtains like that."

The most audacious one I ever encountered was when standing at a bar in London ordering a round of drinks for myself and some friends. A Telly Savalas look alike was standing next to me when suddenly he piped up - "That's a beautiful accent you have."
"Thank you - I'm Scottish."
"Do you have any Greek in you?" He asked.
I smiled "No"
"Would you like some?" He smiled back.
Now you have to admit - that was pretty uninhibited even though it got him nowhere.

I recall being in a bar again in London and without warning, as I ordered drinks, a very attractive lady next to me asked "Are you Glaswegian?"
"Yes" I beamed "Can you tell by my accent?"
"No" she said, "Your teeth and the scar on your face" (I was still waiting on the Police Force paying my dental bill from someone I arrested knocking my front two teeth out.)
Now hers was a pretty bad chat up line and more like the kind of thing I was likely to say. But even so I was appalled and realised just how bad my own must be.

Before and in-between marriages (I've been married three times) I had ample opportunity to refine my 'chat up lines' in the hope that I'd catch the perfect lady with the perfect line - but writing about it here this evening has made me ask myself the question 'What were the first words I ever spoke to the ladies I married?'
First wife - "Is this your banana?"
Second Wife - "You idiot, you almost ran me over!"
Third and yes dear, FINAL Wife - "I think you may suffer from Hypnogogia"

All those years of fussing and fretting over the chat up line that would lead to Nirvana and "I think you may suffer from Hypnogogia" was all I needed to learn...

I'm curious - what were the first words you ever said to your partner? Please do let me know in the comments section below!

Rory

Where are you now Mr Murdoch?

I'm outraged, I'm beside myself with anger. My head is about to explode at the sheer insensitivity, the idiocy, the lunacy of an American political commentator called Glenn Beck.

One of the tragedies of modern politics is that teenagers have largely shunned it. Apathy reigns. So when a group of teenagers take themselves off to an island in Norway to engage in the political process we should all be cheering - when those kids are gunned down mercilessly, mothers and fathers left grief stricken and with broken lives who the f&$% does Glenn Beck think he is likening them to 'Hitler Youth'?

I quote - "There was a shooting at a political camp, which sounds a little like, you know, the Hitler Youth. I mean, who does a camp for kids that's all about politics? Disturbing."


Source

Okay Mr Murdoch - let's see if your 'most humble' good self who told a Parliamentary Committee last week that you strived for integrity in your news organisation - can actually live up to those claims. Glenn Beck is an advisor to several Fox News programmes and is currently on your organisation's payroll. Dismiss him now or forever be revealed as a contemptuous liar.

Rory

I Love Captain Ology

The title of today's Blog should read "I Love Technology" please allow me to explain.
My arm and hand are so desperate for surgery that I decided to use 'speech to text' software for typing automatically. However it takes a week or so to train the computer to understand the finer nuances of one's inflections and accent (which is what I have been doing for the last week) - today was to be the grand unveiling (or the 'grant invading' as my computer insisted).

Anyway as you may have guessed, I'm typing one handed again as things didn't go to plan. What should have been 'I'm happy to announce I've found a way of transferring my thoughts to text on my Blog', became
"Yam happy to an ounce I've found a way of  trance ferrying my thoughts to sex on my dog"

As a matter of urgency I found a second more upmarket software today which does the same thing only more expensively. To be honest I was very impressed with it and even now I'm still tinkering away with it. I spoke my first words into it this afternoon when I said "Hello there."
I was floored when it typed - "Damn - You're Scottish. This will be a long learning experience.", so I have high hopes for this one.

Meanwhile I'll leave you with the last words of the cheap one...

"Thank you to all my Block followers for your patients and Percy veering with me"

Rory

Reason og menneskeheten kan ikke bli beseiret.

What can I say on a day like today? What can anyone say?

It's important that something is said however. It's important that all the small voices which ever felt they were stifled in a world where everyone else shouts louder, are heard.


"Reason og menneskeheten kan ikke, vil ikke, bli beseiret."
"Reason and humanity cannot, will not, be defeated"

Mine tanker er hos de gode menneskene i Norge.

Rory