Thursday 25 August 2011

Gone in Sixty Seconds

Many American readers may not have heard of him. He's been languishing in prison for the best part of a decade. Just this week he was released from prison in Scotland and re-arrested and imprisoned again within 60 seconds. Who is this man, and what deadly threat to the nation or the public at large does he present when life behind bars appears to be his long term fate? His name is Steven Gough - and he wants to get naked. Hence his media coined name 'The Naked Rambler'.





I first saw him with my own eyes as he wandered up the A9 toward Inverness some years ago. I must confess my initial instinct was not to avert my eyes, or rush toward him with clothes, but instead it was to offer him something to eat. Poor fella looked really skinny! Of course that may be a consequence of every Macdonalds in the nation locking their doors when he appears, I don't know, but judging by this picture taken the other day - prison food isn't particularly nourishing either.

I'm not really for or against people running around naked - I even think there's a few places I would do it myself - on a beach for example, where there's very little in the way of jabby things to poke you in the eye. But Mr Gough wants the right to be naked everywhere. It's a tough call.

Now there's a wee bit of a wider issue here with Mr Gough - and one that really does deserve some serious consideration. There are Terrorists who spend less time in jail than he has, in fact, the Lockerbie bomber who was responsible for 270 murders spent less time in prison than he has. Society has to either keep Mr Gough locked up forever and concede that 'being naked' warrants more jail time than mass murderers, rapists and even terrorists or let him have his way. Is being naked really that serious that it merits a life behind bars?

As usual his release and subsequent re-arrest became something of a sideshow. He wasn't permitted to sit down in court until some paper had been found to place on the seat for 'sanitary' reasons. Not only was he charged with being naked out there in public for a whole sixty seconds, but he was immediately charged with contempt of court for appearing naked before the Judge (Which strikes me as a wee bit unfair if his principle defence is his claim to a natural right to be naked).

This problem requires solutions. If not found, then for the rest of his life this man will be in prison and even though I think he's being incredibly stupid, stupidity and nudity in my opinion are not reasons to be deprived of liberty for a lifetime - if it were then Paris Hilton would have been lost to Guantanamo Bay forever.

It needs a solution or solutions folks, I can't think of one - I just don't have one which I think would be a happy compromise. Either the man is allowed to be naked or he rots in Jail for the rest of his life with 60 second glimpses of the outside world every couple of years. Of course I say it needs solutions only because I empathise with his plight for the comparative reasons I stated above - there are those who may very well argue that if he wants his pecker on display and the only bags he's carrying to be those he's born with - then he deserves to be in jail - but for life? He's not backing down. Neither is the law. What to do? What to do?

Rory

PS - I just thought of something - Maybe Scotland could lead the world by decreeing that nudity is not 'indecent' if one so chooses - This came to mind particularly as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are currently in Scotland filming a movie. Maybe they could start the ball rolling?

My dear Wife has just read my Blog and offered a compromise - "He's perfectly free to be naked beneath his clothes."

Thanks dear :)


27 comments:

  1. Perhaps Mr. Gough could be given a plane ticket, courtesy of the Scottish government, to Cap d'Agde, France, where everyone is naked all the time.

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  2. Ohhh thank you for that Suzanne. I would never have spelt the name correctly in Google when trying to buy ticke- I mean looking for research information on it.

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  3. Far too much attention being paid a man who is obviously insane. Drop him on a desert island and leave him there. He'll be dead of skin cancer within the year. (I know I know this doesn't sound like my usual caring and loving self)

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  4. LOL Delores - it's an emotive and divisive subject and one which really doesn't have a compromise position (that I can see). He actually started out naked in England and walked as far as Northern Scotland before his jail sentences got longer and longer. He's Scotland's problem now and I really don't think we know how to deal with it other than to keep him locked up.

    As for islands - we do have lots of them - uninhabited too :)

    Rory

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  5. We went thru a heated battle over nudity in my town a few years back, all because a young man (the young woman involved was let go) danced naked in a rainstorm downtown. You can't be nude in Brattleboro now.

    I'd say train him as a forest ranger and put him in the woods where only bears and deer will see him, and he can contribute to society instead of being uselessly warehoused.

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  6. He's clearly not all there. If you're going to choose to live "all naked, all the time", why the hell would you choose chilly Scotland? South Africa, Australia, West Coast USA, even southern Europe, but Scotland?! The word shrinkage springs to mind...

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  7. Oh, please! Let the poor man do what he wants. If the peolple I know are representative of Scotland, so long as he isn't 'harming' anyone, let him wander as he chooses (which is mainly in the countryside). Honestly, the kids I know would laugh their heads off if they ever came in to contact with him - of ALL ages... He's an 'eccentric' and Britain just LOVES eccentricity - look at our leaders past and present!

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  8. Rory! I just saw your picture on BBC Scotland! It was regarding the above post and how much it had been highlighted on the net... then they cut to your picture and comment on twitter!!!! I laughed my head off :-)

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  9. Rory was on BBC Scotland, Annie?!!! Oh my goodness!

    What if he were to glue a leaf over his nether regions... would that be okay? Talk about harsh sentencing. He could probably pull it off if he claimed to be Jesus.

    Personally, I think we should all wear Roman-esque tunics.

    BBC Scotland...

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  10. Dammit, the BBC won't let me into the TV section!!!

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  11. Not passing judgement on the gentleman's attributes, but it sound like much ado about nothing to me. He could benefit from therapy to teach him when it's OK and when it's not OK to wave his genitals around in the breeze, but it's ludicrous to keep throwing him in jail. Heck, send him to live with the natives in Africa. They don't care a fig about clothes, and it's a lot warmer than Scotland.

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  12. Seems there's some prurience among the distinguished assembled commentators! Some form of therapy or isolating him somewhere is the solution apparently. And he's cost thousands to deal with. Actually the authorities have spent thousands which is different. They needn't have done that; they could just have left him alone. So you see a naked man walk past. So? I vote we just leave him alone and lets all get on with something more important. Personally I'm concentrating on this pizza I'm making.:)

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  13. Are there no naked communities in Scotland? We have nude beaches, why not nude colonies or communities where people are free to live, work, shop, dine out in the nude? Seems to me that there has to be more than one nudist in Scotland, you would think that rather than shutting that poor man away in jail for the rest of his life, they would ask that he go live in a nudist colony. Sheesh.

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  14. CarrieBoo - I'm wondering if the subtle pun in your comment was intended or not lol :) I'm going to mark it up as a sign of comedy genius on your part.

    Annie - Me? On the Beeb lol? Wow someone must really read my tweets then - I thought they just disappeared off into cyberspace lol.

    Susan - I too wonder why he's not at least carrying out his protest in warmer climes in the South of England. Being naked in Perth prison in the middle of winter doesn't bear thinking about.

    Alec - I tend to lean in your direction as the punishment does not appear to fit the 'crime'.

    Austan - See, there's a time and place for it and I think it would be ok. I really don't want to meet some naked guy carrying a shopping basket pondering over the vegetables at my local Tesco. But neither do I want to stifle people's real joy, real pleasure and self expression, to get naked like in the scenario you described. It seems harsh.

    Caledonia Lass - There are no nude communities in Scotland that I'm aware of. There are some 'let's get naked' houses in Glasgow and Edinburgh but we generally call them brothels. Apart from that, no I can think of nowhere in Scotland where 'nudity' is the norm.

    Rory

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  15. Well, it would appear that Steve (the naked rambler) has been nakedly rambling for some years, walking the famous Land's End to John o'Groats (the length of the uk). Apparently, he has no problem when rambling in England, but because of a difference in Scottish law, he get's banged up each time he crosses the border! In his most recent attempt, he managed to reach Perth...

    Oh, Scotland, get a life!

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  16. Craig, my apologies for some reason I missed your comment earlier - though blogspot has been behaving horrendously of late.

    Yeah if I were to stand on this principle of his then I'd damn well do it somewhere warm. Maybe he just likes 'Porridge' both literally and metaphorically?

    I do think we are being too harsh on him however and with some round the table talking maybe a compromise could be found. Someone on a TV show recommended 'tricking him' into playing strip poker thereby getting him to put clothes on - once done then duct tape him up and throw him out of prison...

    Rory

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  17. Annie - I forgot to ask - did the BBC show my good side? lol :)

    Rory

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  18. :-) It just showed a page of twitters and your wee soncey face (black and white picture above) was there more than any other - I thought I'd entered the twilight zone as I'd just finnished commenting on your blog and was contemplating my human right to parade naked!!!

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  19. LOL Annie - I often parade around the house in the scud but it's pretty sheltered here as the house is surrounded by palm trees and other assorted jungle. When we went swimming for the first time here I wrapped a towel around myself and started to get undressed and my wife nearly collapsed. It seems folks don't do that in Australia lol. You go to changing rooms which are always nearby.

    Rory

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  20. LOL! Yes, um, comedy genius. *cough* (I'm funnier than I realized.)

    This man will make for quite the folktale one day. "Beware the moors, and stick t'ot path."

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  21. Carrie! I kid you not - I was in a pub exactly like that one in American Werewolf - and in the same part of the country - and in the mist! When my friend and I walked in carrying guitars stony silence ensued. I honestly thought we were going to be eaten that night or at the very least offered to the devil.

    It's a weird place...

    Rory

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  22. You know I suppose its a bit vain of me, but if he wants to be naked can he be sexy too? I mean where's the muscles and the firm butt and such? Instead you get a poor skinny dude that really needs a few good meals. I dont have all that much against being naked, aside from the sanitary issue and really it is a true issue. I dont want someones butt germs on me. I really dont.

    ctny

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  23. I am quietly LOLing at 6:59am on a Saturday, Rory. Oh crap!

    Butt germs... ah, Courtney. ;)

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  24. I agree that it's unreal the slight punishments that rapists, murders, etc get - those need to be more sever, imo. Now the guy who wants to be nakey...well, there are laws and if he doesn't want to follow the law, he stays behind bars. It's all about choices and apparently the need to be naked and behind bars is more important than being clothed and free. I don't feel sorry for him...

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  25. I am all for nudity but only for men that look like russell Crowe
    am I too fickle?

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  26. As most of your posters seem to agree, just leave the guy alone. As winter gets closer he'll head south anyway. It makes no sense to keep him locked up at huge expense.

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  27. I bet it makes him mad that he has to wear clothes in jail.

    or maybe he doesn't??

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